Reasons

There is a reason for everything, that is what somebody once told me as I watched my oldest child fight and eventually lose his life to cancer. I asked my self why, what is the reason for taking the life of an 8 year old, What good can come of that? until you are able to step back and remove yourself from the situation you will never understand. Finally after years of wondering one day I realized why, I had made a huge career change and am now helping children and parents through similar situations and through all this found the most beautiful, caring, compassionate, simply amazing woman who has become my wife and soul mate, when I look at her there is no more pain, only happiness(thanks mom). There are two kinds of loss, when someone you love dies and when someone you created a family with tries to take whats left of your family away. As a father when you lose a child the pain you feel just can not be put into words, but when you look at your wife who carried that child for 9 months, who's body nurtured it and protected it, some how the pain goes a little deeper. Then as you look at your other children, who all of a sudden lose their "place" in the family and really have no idea how to deal, that is the exact moment in time you feel your heart break. So I ask, how can someone manipulate, lie and deliberately try to alienate their children from their ex. How can they do that to their children, because one day after many years and counseling sessions they are going to realize what has gone on, and that to me is just more unnecessary pain for the children to deal with. They know what it feels like to lose a child, the never ending daily emptiness, the part of you that never seems to come back. I think that is what is so hard for me to swallow.  Like I have said, it is a long process and when you realize what is happening and what very little you can do about it that feeling of loss is just as deep. I now understand the reason for my son losing his life to cancer(I do not like it, but I understand), but I am not sure I will ever understand the reason for what is happening now. I just want to enjoy life with my family, can't we all just get along?